some hot takes

we (feminists) want the norm to be that women’s lives don’t revolve around men — this is the purpose of the bechdel test — acknowledgement that men should not be the center

how to decenter someone you’re in love with; arbitrary binary between romantic + platonic love; misunderstanding of love either as only giving or as only taking; misunderstanding of love as not being about the self

western relationship models: all about individuality and severing connection between the physical + metaphysical

we need to center ourselves within + in the context of communities, with the understanding that loving others requires + informs self love

the rhetoric that we need to center our jobs, our passions, our dreams is no more radical than centering romantic partners; it’s still a way of automatically decentering ourselves without realising it / centering our identities externally

the only reason why we think sad art is great is because we’re all fucking sad