Disordered thoughts
Personality disorder. Narcissist. Bipolar. Schizophrenic. Manipulative. Self-destructive, impulsive, abusive, dramatic, unpredictable, lacking empathy... the list of stereotypes goes on. It's difficult to know what's true and what's false when you're trying to research personality disorders.
I know someone who has a friend with borderline personality disorder. This person repeatedly confuses borderline personality disorder with bipolar disorder. These are two separate disorders and two different diagnoses, with separate symptoms and often unrelated forms of treatment. (Bipolar is commonly referred to as BP, whereas borderline is referred to as BPD.)
Bipolar disorder is classified as a mood disorder; it impacts mood, energy, activity levels, and the ability to carry out day-to-day tasks. From a brief Google search, I gathered that there are four "types" of bipolar disorder. I'm not bipolar, so I'm not at all an expert on it.
Borderline personality disorder is, well, a personality disorder; it impacts self-image and behavior, especially with regard to interpersonal relationships. It is one of the cluster B personality disorders. The others are antisocial personality disorder, histrionic personality disorder, and narcissistic personality disorder. These disorders are disproportionately demonized in mainstream media, and the dearth of cluster B media representation does nothing to help us.
People with BPD interact with the world differently because of the disorder, but we are all complex human beings, so no one will have the exact same experience. Because of this, stereotypes surrounding borderline personality disorder can actually get in the way of someone being diagnosed, and those stereotypes can also lead to people being misdiagnosed. Categories are helpful, but if we over-categorize, we'll actually miss the most important part of what we're trying to find.
The words we use directly impact the ability of the people around us to cope with the world. For example, society refers to people we perceive as evil as "sociopaths" -- in reality, "sociopath" is an outdated term for someone with antisocial personality disorder. We reduce people with narcissistic personality disorder to their diagnosis, and we armchair diagnose people who most likely don't even have NPD. We call people "schizophrenic" for having noticeable mood swings instead of normalizing the idea that people can have mood swings without necessarily having personality disorders. By doing this, we are essentially removing the ability of people with personality disorders to be complex, three-dimensional people by demonizing the traits associated with these personality disorders.
How to fix this? We need to start by being intentional and careful about the words we are using, and we need to stop putting people into boxes. Dictionary definitions often don't apply in many situations; for example, the word "homosexual," while still technically correct, erases the existence of transgender lesbians and gay men. If we assume that everyone with borderline personality disorder is automatically emotionally manipulative, we are taking away their agency to work on the facets of their disorder(s) that harm other people.
Most importantly, please understand that everyone, with or without a personality disorder, is trying. We know we are fucking up and we want to do better. A lot of us aren't able to get help even though we need it. Please be patient with us. Please treat us like humans.